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[11 Nov 2009|09:26pm] |
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this must be what it feels like to be totally dead inside. i must be.
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[11 Nov 2009|08:46pm] |
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last night, i listened to the album i made for you back in april. i don't know why. it's not like i thought it'd be a good idea. i wonder... have you ever listened to it?
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[11 Nov 2009|01:42am] |
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please don't make me wake up. i'd really rather not. i don't wanna do anymore. i've run my race. it's over. so please don't make me wake up.
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[10 Nov 2009|09:33pm] |
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Once upon a time, the most beautiful girl in the world loved me. And i never, not for one second, ever thought that we wouldn't be together forever. But it happened. And it murdered my heart and my soul. I loved her so much. Once upon a time, she loved me.
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[10 Nov 2009|10:16am] |
i've lived in this apartment for at least a couple months now. and nobody's been in it except for my parents and my sister... and of course my cat and i. maybe that means i don't have any friends. obviously, i'm lonely as hell.
i am in no way at all needed in this world.
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[08 Nov 2009|02:10am] |
stayed in bed today until about 6:30pm. the only reason i got up was because i couldn't sleep longer.
i'd like to go now please.
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[06 Nov 2009|09:14am] |
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i just looked at all the old pictures of you that are still in my phone. oh my love... where are you... where'd you go... why did you leave me... you used to be mine... i want that back... that's all i want... i really can't find a reason to live otherwise.
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[03 Nov 2009|10:08pm] |
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how did she do that? i must not have ever been much of anything to her... even though she was everything to me.
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| shark tooth |
[03 Nov 2009|04:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sore |
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music |
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old |
] |
oi
bored on a tuesday early evening. what will the night bring me? i dont know?
why are apartments called apartments when theyre so close together?
sick of hospitals.
regina spektor is hecka cool.
i feel its dumb for me to say that so ill counter attack with this:
pentagram is hecka cool.
stoked rusty and i are doing a cool tacoma angelfire page. hope we go through with it. daily sauce will be the best page.
I once thought I had mono for an entire year. It turned out I was just really bored.
can i tour yet?
want to watch wayne's world now.
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[02 Nov 2009|10:09pm] |
hey,
i miss you. i think about you everyday. almost all the time. and i think about you and him. and it makes me want to die.
i will.
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[01 Nov 2009|04:44pm] |
i walk around with a heavy weight inside me. everyday. all the time. it's everywhere inside of me.
it's over. all over. it has been for a long time.
i am over. so, why am i still here?
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[01 Nov 2009|03:19am] |
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i just wanna be dead. i don't want to live in this hell anymore. the only way for me to not be so sad... all the time... is to not exist. please let me go... i don't know who i'm talking to... i don't wanna be sad anymore. so please let me die.
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[01 Nov 2009|01:46am] |
it's just too sad.
can't i just go?
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[31 Oct 2009|09:25pm] |
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there is nothing that can or will happen... that will make me want to live.
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[31 Oct 2009|08:21pm] |
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i miss weezer. but i still skip it whenever one of their songs come on the shuffle. the first time i tried to kill myself, i could hear weezer...
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[31 Oct 2009|07:17pm] |
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1 year ago, kane hodder played a halloween show at the jackson hall. she was a bumble bee.
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[31 Oct 2009|03:16pm] |
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the rest of my life is a waste of time.
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| 10-10-321 |
[31 Oct 2009|12:02pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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music |
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hate eternal |
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does 10 10 321 still work on all long distant calls??
yesterday sucked.
but brian and rusty saved my life.
my dad is in the hospital right now and he will be going in for double bypass heart surgery on monday.
my sister is also having a cancerous tumor removed from her jaw the same day.
i keep forgetting nobody's invincible.
not really scared which is cool.
last night i was falling asleep to the new office and a grasshopper crawled on my arm. how are there 500 different bugs in the basement.
halloween tonight. whad up?
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[31 Oct 2009|10:31am] |
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I also miss Macy Ragasa, DUH!
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| Look who's back |
[31 Oct 2009|10:27am] |
I love Halloween, Courtney Peterson, swedish meatballs,Nina Polkinghorn, my new boots, and akward situations.
I hate Gloria Rigdon, that's it.
I miss Sarah Keay, Puppetmaster, Little Laura and big Buddy, Grandma, money, and the sound of a tattoo gun.
Oh wait, I also hate paranormal activity. Worst movie ever! I still hate Gloria more though.
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[31 Oct 2009|12:10am] |
i have no self-worth. i think i am a worthless piece of shit. because that's what i became to her for some reason. and she is the prettiest girl i have ever known. and for some reason, she was mine for 3 years. we were about to get married. i will never have someone as pretty as her again. but yeah, i want to go away now. i don't believe that anything worthwhile, or good enough to warrant sticking around for... is to come in my future.
nothing in my future... nothing worth holding out for. there is no reason to live the rest of my life. I MEAN NOTHING TO MYSELF. AND I WANT TO FUCKING DIE.
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[30 Oct 2009|07:38pm] |
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i am so sad. so sad. i can't live now. i just can't. how did she... why did she... i won't make it out of this. i don't even want to meet someone new. doesn't someone have a pill? or poison?
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| More Kane Hodder "Reunion" Stuff (Myspace blog re-post)!! |
[29 Oct 2009|11:41pm] |
The "Frank Exploration..." and "Pleasure to Remain..." Kane Hodder line up is reuniting in December, to play a show with our dear friends in Schoolyard Heroes. Here are the details of the show:
107.7 The End’s The Young & The Restless & El Corazon Present:
The 4th Annual “Home For The Horrordays” featuring:
Schoolyard Heroes
These Arms Are Snakes
Kane Hodder (ALL ORIGINAL LINE UP!!)
Sirens Sister
Plus A Very Special Guest
$15
Doors open at 7:00 PM
Show starts at 8:00 PM
Tickets Available at Ticketswest Outlets & The Door
Here are some videos from that era. If you have any pictures from this era please share them with us.
Share these videos with your friends, spread the word!!
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[29 Oct 2009|08:45pm] |
I won't be ok. You can tell me to get over it. You can even give me good advice or positive thoughts. But yeah... I can't get over it. Lots and lots of good things can happen for me... But nothing can make this ok. Nothing.
It's enough to make me wish i was dead... Every single day of my life.
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